Biblical Perspective of Trust
Why do so many people who have experienced hurts and pains in their lives run from God? Why do they flee from the very One who has the power to heal their hurting hearts?
I believe the answer to these questions is simple at the core. People run away from God because they do not trust him. Some of us believed that he abandoned us, others blame him for his perceived complicity in the crimes committed against us. Still others manage to silence the inherent knowledge of God that is birthed in each of us as we emerge from the womb and convince themselves that God, at least the God of the Bible, does not exist. If you have ever gone on a “religious” forum, you have probably discovered that those who hide behind denial of the existence of a Divine Father, often become scornful, or even verbally abusive, to those who suggest they may be missing something. Their security, it seems, depends on believing that the God of the Universe is a myth.
I understand distrust–for I, too, learned that no one is to be trusted. It was a lesson learned the hard way–for I trusted someone who took advantage of my innocence. Someone I loved. Trust that has been ruptured is like a bag of rice in the hands of a hungry child–an empty bag. A bag with holes in it. The nutrition has eked out of it and left an empty shell. How does the starving child retrieve the rice in the aftermath of her disappointment? Does she even have the heart to search for it? She will be afraid to reach out and receive the bag from other hands, for disappointment seems more devastating than starvation.
Every healthy relationship is built upon trust. Without trust we become dysfunctional and destroy the very love that we long to keep. We become jealous and paranoid, or else distant and dead–swathed in the burial clothes of denial. Numbed to the ebb and flow of life and love.
We need a Father to teach us to trust. The giver of life is the giver, also, of every good gift–the gifts that we desperately need in order to live well upon this earth. The gift of authenticity, of compassion, of faith, and of love. The gift of a trusting heart. All the issues of our life, as the ancient King Solomon said, come out of our heart (Proverbs). The heart is the holder of our treasures.
Unfortunately, the redemption of our treasures does not come about instantaneously when we “decide” to trust God.
Love may be rendered unconditionally, but trust is earned. By the agonizing process of trial and error, we reclaim the treasure of a trusting heart. We need to learn how to pursue our gifts safely–otherwise we may find ourselves revictimized and plunged even deeper into the depths of despair. Many abuse survivors, hungry for a morsel of rice, have found themselves drawn into unhealthy relationships that disappointed their hopes and left their dreams shattered into a thousand pieces. Some resign from life at that point, put on a crusty shell, and convince themselves that “it just isn’t worth it.” They find alternative lifestyles, substituting lust for love, and pretend that they have found the answer to their dilemma–love that bypasses the need for a loving God. They have exchanged rice for dust and filled their bellies with toxic waste that destroys the good that lives still beneath the hurt and the pain.
As long as there is life, there is possibility of redemption. Redemption of our life and our treasures. Redemption of our soul. But it will not come easy. Only by facing the harsh reality of the hole in the bag will we be motivated to pursue the path of healing and reclaim the treasures that have been spilled out along the way. As we accept the “things we cannot change” we will begin to find the power to “change the things we can” and learn to “know the difference.” Only then will we emerge into serene lives that are fully connected to others and healthy in our interdependence on God and others. (Prayer of Serenity by Reinhold Niebuhr).
A network of trusting relationships, loving support, and wise counsel will help us rebuilt our trust in God and others without falling into the trap of revictimization.
On of my favorite scriptures is Prov: “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him and he will direct your paths.” Proverbs 3:5-6
I need a divine director. One who sees beyond my limited perspective and has promised to direct me in the way that I should go. Only as I learn to trust him, submitting in small ways and acknowledging his wisdom and care for me, will I gain the confidence to “lean” on him–to follow his directives through his Word and his provision. Only then, will I find that my bag is full and my hunger is truly satisfied.